You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
