my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
