Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
