ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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