I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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