God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
