It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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