just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I think my moral compass just broke
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
