if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
All the doctor said was why
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
