dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
