i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
