I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
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