I'm drive I can fine osifer
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
