the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
