I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Is Oprah even human
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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