idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
