coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
