you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
