come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
