that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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