If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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