Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I want to walk on stilts...naked
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Randomize
