my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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