My girlfriend figured out who you are.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
i dont even know how to be here
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
