I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
