after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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