It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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