all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
