I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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