i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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