You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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