I think I died a long time ago.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
