yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
