how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize