you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
We need to feng shui this bitch.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
