She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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