Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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