I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Randomize