what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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