I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I did not marry a roomba.
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