he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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