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??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
