that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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