Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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