i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
