Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize