...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
