I think i peed on brittanys purse
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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