You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
