Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
